I find it hard to see teenage guys cry...especially the way these two cried today.
Okay...actually, they didn't cry much, but I've been crying buckets ever since.
Two boys, different circumstances, at different times--within an hour of each other. Each one carries such pain. I see the pain engulfing them, and yet they are running. The pain is too scary, rather then reaching out to engage, they pull back. One loses himself in studies, doesn't even want to come for meals. When he is alone, when he is reading a book, he can be happy, but not with people. But the tears came when he said, "In my family, no one but my mom cares about me. My stepdad doesn't care for me at all." Ever since junior high, when he's needed school fees, dad (stepdad, his own dad died earlier) won't borrow money for him, tells his mom to go do it.
The other...I'm not even sure what is at the root of it, or, what exactly is the nature of the pain for him right now. It's got to be hard--when you go home, you have to take care of your parents--dad has mental problems, mom has hearing problems. Both seem a little crazy. I suspect his heart is just now waking up to the pain of the life he was born into, and the impact for the future. Sounds like uncle, who takes care of him, might be putting on a fair bit of pressure, and guilt too?
Oh God...have mercy. How do we love these guys? And how many others are hurting just as bad? The older brother of one of our students told us the younger brother wanted to commit suicide about a month and a half ago. So many...carry pain that is too painful to face. I want to help them face it, but...I am not strong enough to enable and strengthen...only You are. But you...they don't know You. How can they know You? How can they know? How can they gain the hope their heart needs?
God have mercy
Christ have mercy
Love through us