All I know is weak

maybe I was supposed to lead
maybe I was supposed to show them
how to be strong
but all I know is weak

weak
broken
floundering
crying out to help
running to my only Refuge
falling on Him
knowing Him strong
knowing Him faithful
through the years
and many tears
the dark
the clouds
the wandering

flat on my face
crawling
holding on
just barely
or not even holding on
but knowing Him 
holding on to me

this is all I know to do
this is all I know to show you how to do
to be weak

be weak
and name it
own it
say it
with tears streaming down your face
sadness in your eyes
apologizing for the more that you can't give
make the changes needed
ask for the help needed
receive the strength that comes
from Him
directly
or through others

no, I am not strong
I can only show you how to be weak

but the weak
somehow
in the weirdest twist of all
becomes strength that rises
a deep, firm core
a deep stabilizing
so weak
but unable to be
thoroughly defeated
a weak that becomes strong
and frees others
to be weak
and eventually
grow strong

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