"Without lament we have no way of being honest before God when bad things happen."

A couple of weeks ago I had a week that could best be described as "lament."  In some ways, this has been a big long season with bouts of lament, but that week I especially felt it.  I'm thankful to Erika Haub, for the above quote (and the link to the sermon from which it comes), that gave me the word ... lament. That week I was also referred to "That Dark Cloud" post by Karen Spears Zacharias (thanks to Jesus Creed's Weekly Meanderings!).  All letting me know--it is okay.  It is okay to cry.  It is okay to feel the darkness, and lament before our God.

One night that week, when the tears were coming, I found and purchased two albums that I would recommend for times of lament--Bebo Norman's Ocean and Steven Curtis Chapman's Beauty Will Rise. They contain songs of pain, searching, seeking and waiting on God through the night. There are also songs of choosing to trust and remembering He is faithful, but not in some flighty, it-will-be-okay-in-two-seconds sort of way. I just listened again to Bebo Norman's "Remember us" and "God of my Everything" ... ah...beautiful.

And...well, maybe you can tell... in this season, I'm finding my heart longing for God alone. I've come to the end of human resources--in myself, or others. Oh I know I still need to be with others, and know God in community with others. I'm just feeling very off-balance in knowing what that should be, how it should look, and very uncertain...many adjustments need to be made. In myself, I just know that I am completely unable to change myself. All I can do is put myself before God, with longing, and  trust that He does love and care. The hurts...maybe I'm just a cry-baby, and eventually need to just 'suck it up'. It's still nice to know he understands--how I feel so weak against all the different things that have come up. I can cry in the night and He gives strength for the day. Some of the hurts--I know I'm still working through to complete forgiveness in a situation...and needing to look long and hard at Him to learn how He does it. Still, in the process, there are tears, and that is okay.

Below are some of the lyrics from Bebo Norman, even better when you hear him singing them. Enjoy!

God of My Everything
Oh God of Heaven come and hem me in
Gather the pieces that are broken
Show me the wonder of You again
Oh God of Heaven

God of my hope, God of my need
God of my pain that no one else will ever see
God of my healing, God of my strength
God who has always and will forever reign
God of my everything

In all creation You call my name
In all the beauty that this world displays
Still I'm the one for whom Your heart aches
In all creation


God of my everything

And when the mountains shake
You are my God
You never change

And when the earth gives way
You are still God
You never change


God of my everything
God of my everything
God of my everything

Remember Us
God of goodness, God of grace
See the tears upon our face
We are restless for the day that you come for us all

But our place is here right now
Still this place is breaking down
And some days we don’t know how
We will make it at all

When our hearts are breaking
And our darkest hour is upon us
When the storm is raging
God of heaven, please remember us

When the light of day is gone
And our suffering is long
we lift up our needful song
to the Maker of all


Please remember us
Glory, we cry Glory
All for your Glory, we cling to you



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