If not for this fire...

If not for this fire
If not for this passion that burns inside
Fueled again and again
By their stories
The need
The glimpses
Of pain
And lostness
And confusion
And the glimpses
Of how what I have
What I see
What we have done
CAN make a difference
IS what they need

If not for this fire
I would surely give up
Lay down and die
Pull away
Run
In the countless ways
I know to run

The future
Is so darn scary
The uncertainty
So daunting
I
Am so afraid

Lord,
I don't know where or how
To get the strength
To find the resources

It's hard to 'rally the troops'
Around uncertainty
Hard to even dare to try to tell them
Hard to feel so stupid
And put that out there
For all to see

If not for this fire
I'd run away right now
And courage is not
The absence of fear
But doing what you need to do
In spite of the fear

So, God,
If you want me to continue
If there is something left to do
Then fuel this fire
If it is what is needed
To hold me on course
To compel action
To at least stay put
Until the direction comes
Then, please
Let it burn strong

And may what follows be
Your provision
Your guidance
Your resourcing
In ways only You can do

And may it truly
Meet the need
That fuels this fire