Standing Strong

There are two kinds of standing
Both look so strong, until...

One stands after the crash, after the fall
after all has been revealed
all has been confessed.

This one stands after facing the truth of self, sin, and grace
Owning the self
Owning the sin
Receiving the grace

This one is a crawl through the mud
Bloodied and bruised this one comes
Desperate, needy, broken, humbled

This one stands in the Light where all is revealed
Where heads hang in shame
But this one receives a hand that reaches out
This one knows the One who lifts heads

And when this one stands again
He stands so strong, He stands so tall
Others might come...accusing
"I know what you did"
He smiles, sad, but can say, "I know" "Yes, I did"
And still stands strong

The other's standing looks strong
But is really so fragile
Based on pretense, hiding, a false image for others
A false image of self

It is a weary standing 
Much effort made to make sure know one else knows
Much effort to keep self from not thinking, 
     not remembering, 
          not admitting

It is a fearful standing
For the moment someone else knows
We must deny
If they know, we are not safe
For we have no prodigal's God
We have no God of repentence, confession, grace
We reject the mud, the humility, the shame
We refuse to to stare in the face and say, 
"Yes, this is me."  "Yes, this is what I've done"
We reject the brokenness, so receive no healing

We think we are strong

so we stand
    tall
        strong
             but oh so fragile

There are two kinds of standing
But only one is strong

Ode to a friend, still trying to get out of the mud, still learning to stand in the grace, but oh so courageous in the confession.  In the end, you WILL stand strong my friend.  And nothing will shake you.